Hey, y’all! Welcome back to Adopted Black Girl! It’s been a minute, but I’m so glad to be here with you again. Life has been busy, but I’ve missed connecting with this amazing community of Black adoptees—especially those of us navigating the complexities of kinship adoption.

Today, we’re talking about something real: the holidays. They can be magical but also really hard. In my recent chats with other Black adoptees, it’s clear this season stirs up a lot of emotions, so let’s unpack that together.

The Holidays Hit Different

Thanksgiving just passed, and whew, it was a lot. Living far from family meant my connections were all digital—FaceTime was my lifeline. Don’t get me wrong, I was grateful for it, but let’s be real: a screen doesn’t hug you back.

For many of us adoptees, especially in kinship setups, the holidays can feel like an emotional minefield. All those questions about where we fit, who we are, and how we show up in these layered family dynamics bubble up to the surface.

I’ve been there—sitting awkwardly at family gatherings, unsure how to bridge the gap with my birth parents, especially when the holidays were the only time I saw them. Their absence in my day-to-day made their presence during the holidays feel… complicated.

But this year? I’m flipping the script. I’m prioritizing me. I’m letting go of the guilt that comes with putting my needs first and leaning into self-care. Because honestly, how can we show up for others if we’re running on empty?

The Real Talk: Challenges Black Adoptees Face

In my conversations with other Black adoptees, I’ve noticed a few recurring themes that hit home:

• Microaggressions: The little things people say (or don’t say) that cut deep. They might not mean harm, but it hurts just the same.
• Identity struggles: We’re constantly balancing being Black, being women, and being adoptees—it’s a lot to hold at once.
• Mental health challenges: Our unique journeys come with weighty emotions, and finding culturally competent support isn’t always easy.
• Communication barriers: It can be tough learning how to express ourselves with our families and even with ourselves.
• Access to community: Sometimes it feels like there’s no space where we fully belong. That loneliness can be real.

Let’s be honest—these challenges can make us feel like we’re always on the outside looking in. So what do we do with all that?

Building Our Own Spaces

I truly believe we can change this. By digging deep, we can start addressing the root causes of these struggles. What’s triggering our mental health battles? How can we create the community we crave instead of waiting for it to find us?

This blog, Adopted Black Girl, is one of those spaces. Here, we’re seen, understood, and valued. Together, we can share our stories, lift each other up, and create a sense of belonging that doesn’t rely on anyone else.

As we move through this holiday season, let’s commit to showing up for ourselves and each other. Whether it’s journaling, therapy, venting to a friend, or even just taking a deep breath when things get overwhelming—every little bit counts.

We’re in this together, and I’m so grateful for this community. Let’s keep growing, healing, and finding our joy.

From my home with love,
Teisha